I CAN’T stop crying today. I woke up this morning and felt a piercing sadness. Usually crying once, I’d get over it, but I cried over 5 times, one lasting 2 hrs. What the heck is happening to me?
My very good friend called me this morning and told me that.
It’s okay.
Well, it’s not, but it is.
Sometimes, all you can do is cry. Holding it in won’t reap any benefits.
Changes to your environment, stress level, and physical or mental health could all leave you feeling more emotional than usual. Identifying your triggers can help you be aware of situations that might prompt extra emotions. This insight can help you create a plan to manage your feelings in a healthy way.
You know when your body is insistent upon coughing, but you hold it in until you feel as if you’re going to implode? Your face turns red, your chest begins to shake, you involuntarily splutter and end up drawing even more attention to yourself than you would have if you’d let yourself cough in the first place? That’s no fun, and neither is suppressing your tears. If they’re asking to flow, let them.
Crying is a natural release. You may feel more comfortable doing it without a bunch of people awkwardly staring or hovering over you, asking redundant questions such as “are you okay?”, so give yourself some privacy if needed. Either way, people often feel a tad less heavy after a cry. Let it out, take a breather and, if possible, continue with your day or night.
When it’s hours upon hours and you feel unable to stop, you have a different situation altogether.
What’s wrong with us? Well, nothing. We are human: we feel things, and sometimes those things hurt. Life is challenging, and it’s natural that we’d be reduced to tears by it — hours upon hours of them.
If I find myself crying, I’ll let it happen. If it persists for what I feel is too long, i.e. when it grossly interferes with my time, I will aim to do something else. I won’t go into this believing that it will make me feel better, or that the crying will stop, but with the intention of changing the situation.
We can’t change everything in life, but there is always a chance that we may eventually feel less terrible than we do in the present moment. The situation causing upset may be unchangeable, and we may repeatedly cry about it time and time again, but being able to at least halt hours of tears is something. Dragging ourselves further and further into a pit of misery is, well, completely miserable.
Watch something ridiculous. Cuddle your pet.
Validate yourself. It’s natural that you’ll get upset about some things, and it’s going to be tough pulling yourself out of a downward spiral when things feel completely hopeless. In such an all-encompassing and overwhelming state, it’s a given that other things will keep setting you off. Just, whenever you can, do something else; something that won’t harm you further.
What if you cry again soon after, or simply cannot stop? This too is allowed. What you’re feeling at the moment is real and valid — nobody can take that away from you.
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