THE recent passage of the Absolute Divorce Bill in the Philippines by the House of Representatives marks a significant shift in the country’s approach to marriage and family dynamics. As the Philippines has long been one of the few countries without a divorce law, this development brings both opportunities and challenges.
While the law offers a necessary escape for those trapped in irreparable and harmful marriages, it is crucial to ensure that divorce does not become the default response to marital problems.
This column will attempt to explore strategies that can promote healthy marriages and prevent divorce from becoming the only perceived solution.
Promoting Comprehensive Pre-Marriage Counseling
One of the most effective measures to prevent divorce is to ensure that couples are well-prepared for the realities of marriage. Comprehensive pre-marriage counseling should be mandatory for all couples seeking to marry.
These programs should go beyond the basics of relationship advice and delve into essential topics such as communication skills, conflict resolution, financial planning, and family planning. By equipping couples with the tools to navigate the inevitable challenges of marriage, the likelihood of divorce can be significantly reduced.
Strengthening Marital Support Systems
Marriages do not exist in isolation; they are influenced by a broader social context. Strengthening community and familial support systems can provide couples with the necessary resources to sustain their marriages.
Community-based programs, support groups, and counseling services should be readily available and accessible. These resources can offer guidance, mediation, and support during difficult times, helping couples to work through issues rather than resorting to divorce.
Encouraging Continuous Relationship Education
Just as individuals engage in professional development throughout their careers, couples should be encouraged to invest in continuous relationship education. Workshops, seminars, and online courses focused on maintaining a healthy marriage can help couples continuously improve their relationship skills.
Topics such as effective communication, empathy, intimacy, and mutual respect should be emphasized. Continuous education can reinforce positive behaviors and prevent minor issues from escalating into major problems.
Addressing Socioeconomic Stressors
Socioeconomic factors often play a significant role in marital strife. Financial instability, unemployment, and poverty can place immense strain on marriages. To mitigate these stressors, it is essential to address the root causes through comprehensive social and economic policies.
Job creation programs, financial literacy education, and access to affordable housing can alleviate some of the pressures that contribute to marital breakdown. By improving the overall quality of life, couples are more likely to experience stable and fulfilling marriages.
Promoting Healthy Conflict Resolution
Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but how couples handle conflict can determine the health and longevity of their marriage. Promoting healthy conflict resolution strategies is crucial. Couples should be encouraged to seek mediation and counseling at the first sign of persistent issues.
Professional mediators and counselors can help couples navigate conflicts constructively, fostering understanding and compromise. By learning to manage disagreements healthily, couples can prevent conflicts from eroding their relationship.
Highlighting the Value of Commitment
In an age where individualism is often prioritized, the value of commitment in marriage must be reaffirmed. Educational campaigns and community programs should highlight the importance of commitment, perseverance, and mutual support in marriage.
By fostering a culture that values long-term commitment and the hard work that it entails, couples may be more inclined to invest in saving their marriages rather than opting for divorce at the first sign of trouble.
Ensuring Accessible Mental Health Services
Mental health plays a critical role in the stability of marriages. Depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues can strain relationships. Ensuring that mental health services are accessible and destigmatized is crucial.
Couples should be encouraged to seek help for mental health issues without fear of judgment. Supporting mental health can lead to healthier individuals and, consequently, healthier marriages.
For devout Catholics, enhancing your marriage should include joining these faith-based communities:
Couples for Christ (CFC): Strengthen your marriage by joining this community, an international Catholic lay ecclesial movement dedicated to enriching couple relationships and family life. CFC offers a variety of programs including marriage enrichment retreats, recollections, and weekly household prayer meetings. With formation programs held weekly, monthly, quarterly, and annually, such as post-marriage formation programs, CFC is committed to raising Christian families dedicated to evangelization and Total Human Liberation through the power of the Holy Spirit.
CFC Singles for Christ (SFC): If you’re single and preparing for marriage, CFC Singles for Christ provides invaluable support. Designed for single men and women aged 21 to 40, SFC offers pre-marriage formation programs and pastoral care. This ministry not only supports those considering marriage but also those discerning single blessedness or a religious vocation.
Missionary Families of Christ (MFC): Based in the Philippines, this Catholic charismatic lay community focuses on individual, family, Church, and societal renewal, as well as evangelization. Joining MFC will provide you with a supportive environment for personal and familial spiritual growth.
Bukas Loob sa Diyos (BLD) Covenant Community: Engage in regular spiritual enrichment through BLD’s weekly prayer meetings and encounter programs designed for both singles and married couples. This community offers a nurturing space to deepen your faith and strengthen your relationship.
Worldwide Marriage Encounter: Transform your marriage through the Worldwide Marriage Encounter program. This initiative helps couples listen, share, and connect more deeply, fostering a lasting and supportive relationship.
Brotherhood of Christian Businessmen and Professionals (BCBP): This community is also for married couples within the business and professional community. BCBP offers regular marriage retreats and various programs designed to strengthen and sustain married life.
In addition to participating in these communities, it’s essential to place Jesus Christ at the center of your marriage. Loving each other is crucial, but loving God is paramount. Include God in your decision-making and plans, ensuring His presence in all aspects of your married life. By doing so, your marriage will have the strength to withstand the tests of time.
NOT the default solution
The passage of the Absolute Divorce Bill in the Philippines is a progressive step towards providing individuals with the freedom to leave harmful marriages.
However, this newfound freedom mustn’t lead to divorce becoming the default solution for marital problems. By promoting comprehensive pre-marriage counseling, strengthening support systems, encouraging continuous relationship education, addressing socioeconomic stressors, promoting healthy conflict resolution, highlighting the value of commitment, and ensuring accessible mental health services, we can foster a culture where marriages thrive and divorce is a last resort. In doing so, we honor the sanctity of marriage while also respecting the individual’s right to choose their path.
